just punch me in the face anyway.... er.. i seriously feel like such an ass. and i asked ehr why she cant speak to me.. and she couldnt really answer.. it sounded kinda like over anger still.. maybe being hurt.. who knows.. but she said i could go to the game tomororw night!!! SO guess where I will be...!! ok.. just since.. i realized this.. her IMs are so different.. and depressing.. barely any punctuation.. NO emotion... i kinda wanna ask hre if this IMing will eventually turn into a friendship.. otherwise it's probably not worth it... cuz... i think it hurts her more... and that bugs me.. god. im glad this never happened with em ro ash..
but it never really would.. I dont think i've ever known anyone or been so... like.. personally connected to someone.. and i think thats why this is erking me so much.. cuz.. like.. i get in fights with other people but.. i'd never been as close with other people than i was with brit. cuz she told me quite a bit.. and well she knows a coupel things NO other people know... so i raelly feel like... i need to do anything.. to just make her better. but i cant.. cuz she cant speak to me.. so.. i guess i will show up.. like... RIGHT at 7 or well 650ish for warm ups... i wanted to catch some of jv but.. this will be mighty awkward.. i dont wanna go back in that school. Id seriously almost rather catch an away game!
but.. i'll go.:-) I really wanna go! ive been waiting to go! I feel like im a fucking dog going for a car ride... well yah.. um anwyays.. i can't really talk about this cuz i have lots of eye make up on.. (and OH YAH DID IT FUCKIN WORK.. for future readings.. like way future when i dont remember this moment!! Skylar=hooked;-) What girlfriend!!!) hahaha so yah.. idk whether to stay in this when i go see him AGAIN or.. go into sweats... oh well. but yah.. i need to go play my army game and shoot some fuckin people before i shoot myself or my fuckin parents....
poor matt... i feel your pain buddy.. but Im smarter than you:-) I wont get caught.
I kinda wish she could see me in person, cuz I have so many fun times running thru my head... OC and CSI marathons, sledding, snowmobiling!! Perhaps a little shopping, idk theres SOOOO much.. anyways.. that was my depressing thought.. all the times we miss out on.. but hey, im just hoping SOME times come back.. even if its not til summer or fall.. trampolines:-) 4 wheelers, clouds and sun! pools! omg.. yah. depressing, watery eyes. gosh, im so dramatic sometimes and i dont even mean to be. haha